Men at work

I said I'd start this old thing up again today and I am but there's a few administration type things to do before a full post is there. Currently I'm getting rid of spammers, I love spam!

Got to look at all the Google options as well.

No Ball Games

That's what the signs said when I was a kid.

I'm a Dundonian and quite proud of it. We're pretty much Scotlands forgotten city and in the 70's our council screwed up our heritage by taking backhanders for tearing down our historical buildings but I still love the city. Given this I was quite shocked when Rosa got a friend request on Facebook by my sister Angela who stated on her page that she comes from Carnoustie!

To be fair we did move to Carnoustie for a few years but give me a fucking break. Angela isn't just from Dundee she's from Whitfield and Douglas which were really bad places at the time, one of my first memories is getting my toys stolen off me by kids coming back from school. This doesn't mean you should deny it all though, what's wrong with doing good whilst coming from a bad place?

OTOH she's loaded now because she married a man the same age as our dad and perhaps a little lying helps smooth the process. You wouldn't want to give him a shock before it all goes through.

Let's be other people

More normal stuff to blog about soon but as an aside my new Trail of Cthulhu campaign started last week and I'm blogging about it elsewhere. My thoughts are going to be in the Keeping Cthulhu blog whilst my players probably won't bother posting to the Trailing Cthulhu blog. Ian's already posted a pic though it seems his smartphone is a bit stupid on the old text fromt.

Hopefully this will turn out to be an exciting game that changes us all, moves our hearts and adds to the art in the world. It's more likely to break down in a mess of hatred and recrimination or just not work at all but I'm willing to give it a go.

Cthulhu ftagn ftagn!

Even polar bears need warm hearts to make it through the snow!

I have a lovely sister-in-law. She's intelligent, witty and has very pretty eyes. Not as pretty as mines of course but who does? Unfortunately she's also completely delusional.

Back at the beginning of December we here in jolly old Scotland had a wee bit of snow. When I say a wee bit it was the worst snowfall here since records began. My sister-in-law, we'll call her Marieka since that's her name, thought that this sounded great. Living in South Africa she's never seen actual snow falling from the actual sky and thinks it's a wonderful and romantic thing and wants to experience it herself.

To be fair snow is a wonderful and romantic thing when you've just got up and you're watching it through the double-glazing whilst sipping coffee. That's a great 5 minutes. Afterwards it's just a complete fucking hassle! To truly experience snow you have to go through a couple of weeks of digging the car out, falling on your arse on the black ice and generally freezing your bollocks off.

I know some will say that we only had about six inches, that's nothing compared to Alaska or Finland, and I could always move somewhere warmer but that's kind of missing the point. The UK isn't set up to deal with this kind of stuff because in general it's not ususally this bad so it's kind of pointless to invest in an infrastructure you only need every decade or so, if I lived in Finland I'd probably kill myself like so many other peeps who live in Finland do and all the warmer places are fucking dangerous!

You see the beauty of living in Scotland is that the country itself isn't actively trying to kill you. We don't have deadly snakes, venomous spiders or sicko dropbears. Generally the only way to get the environment to kill you here is to a complete idiot and go ice-climbing or something and you've got to be a real idiot as all the way up the pregnant weather girl on the radio will be telling you that it's only idiot weather on the hills.

Frankly I like living in a slightly miserable but pretty safe country where you don't have to check the bowl before you have a crap in case there's a giant bollock eating spider in there. For those who want to experience the wonders of snow you're invited across nexst time as long as you're out at seven every morning with a spade, are willing to travel 20 miles on black ice in the dark each way and nip out for my fags.

Resurrecting the crap!

Ok so it's been a while and when that happens it takes a bit to get the stuff goinf again. Proper post soon and it'll be about the horrors of the winter.

And the picture disnae fit. To be totally frank I've spent a fair part of an hour sorting out the wee bits to get the auld blog up and running so if ye can help out just a wee bit by clicking on the picture it would be appreciated. You don't have to likesay though I will think less of you.

Parochial News Day

So I've managed not to post for an awfy long time and it's nobodies fault but my own. I'll get back to regularly posting for my reader soon but before that let's have a look at what the local peeps in sunny Dundee have been talking about.

Those of you in the Colonies may not be aware that the government of the Heart of the Empire has been having a bit of a rough time at the moment. Leaked documents have revealed that our supposedly trustworthy MP's have been fiddling their expenses for years on soft porn, moats and duck houses. Of course this hasn't been the solely a crime of New Labour, let's face it not even the biggest betrayer of Socialism's cause has a moat just yet, so voters in the English Council and European elections obviously felt the need to look for another party which would uphold the British values of fairness, social democracy and equality. Many chose the British National Party.

Now I've mentioned this bunch of vile racist scum at least once before and my opinion hasn't changed in the slightest. Given that I was shocked when I received a BNP leaflet through the door saying that it's people just like me who vote for them and I should vote for them because,

It's not racist to oppose mass immigration and political correctness - it's common sense

Which is funny since I'm married to an immigrant and a big believer in not being a bigoted twat which political correctness seems to be about. Weird to think that I'm they're targeted group likesay. Needless to say I voted Green.

In the end our little fascists managed to win quite a few English council seats and two seats in the European Parliament thanks to many Labour supporters not voting because Labour are shitebags and idiots voting for them either because they don't think the party's about hate or because they're full of hate themselves. So flush from victory to racist Nick Griffin decides to hold a press conference outside parliament,



Haven't you always wondered why the members of the master race are always so plug ugly? I've also always wondered why peeps who decide to egg fascists don't boil them first.

Anyway the noble citizenry of my home town reacted thus,

Democratic right
Those who tried to attack BNP leader Nick Griffin after the recent Euro elections are an affront to the democratic system.

The same goes for the politicians who said it is a bad day for Britain — who are worried about the BNP’s rise.

The BNP seems to me to be the only ones willing to tackle crime. — George Aimer, Kinghorne Road, Dundee.

So Mr Aimer thinks that as long as you put the good old bobbies back on the beat a wee bit of racism and homophobia alright likesay. You'd think that all the crime committed by Dundee's immigrant population, obviously in the evenings when they leave their 12 hour day jobs that we don't want to do or universities that we can't be arsed going to, hugely outweighs what's done by Shuggy the ned. To be fair George would probably bring back the birch and hanging for Shuggy.

It's a proud day to be Dundonian.

Where do the nights of sleep go when they do not come to me?

So normal life has gotten into the way of me updating my blog yet again. I doubt anybodies really a'that bothered but if you are soz an a'that.

Rosa's nipped down to Kiwiland to visit a friend who's just lost her mother to cancer. I've a mate up here waiting for his father to go the same way and I can only imagine how hard it must be. There's not much you can say but they're all in my thoughts. It's weird not having the lass around and it seems to have fucked up my sleeping, probably because I've gotten used to sleeping whilst hanging off the side of the bed and trying to cosy into a small corner of duvet. At least I've got the satisfaction that Rosa'll be suffering hideous jetlag over there.

On a brighter note we managed to catch The Black Seeds in Edinburgh before she left. Barnaby and the gang were as brilliant as ever and I liked the sound of their new stuff. I only hope that the new album is nearly as good as they are live. I've found their previous albums good but not great and know they can do better. If Fat Freddy's Drop can make a great studio album surely they can.

I'd like to tell you that when Rosa's gone I spend my time moping round the house, pining at work and crying into my pillow late at night but that would be a lie. I've actually spent most of my time watching zombie films and playing Fallout 3 on the old Xbox. Fallout 3 is the new CRPG set in a post-apocalyptic world where you try to survive and solve problems in the traditional way, shooting peeps in the face!



See what I mean?

This isn't to say that I've gone all hermit-like or anything. I got free tickets to the Scotland-New Zealand rugby match from an awfy nice Kiwi bloke called Matt so I dragged wee Graham through yesterday for lunch at my club then the pleasure of watching Scotland finally defeat the Kiwi's. Lunch was very nice. I've also got tickets to see De La Soul on Thursday which should be fucking great. Lacking a Kiwigirl to go with I've had to convince my mate Jamesie who hates hiphop that buying a ticket and driving me there and back is a great idea. Weirdly enough he's agreed on the proviso that I am absolutely not allowed to wear hiphop shorts, converse in a ghetto stylee or gett blinged up. He's a harsh man but fair.