Monday, January 15, 2007

In which Garry wanders through Youtube

You know when I started blogging last year I though this is it finally my voice will be heard, lives will be touched by my startling prose, deep-seated political views will be changed and we will all begin to question Globalisation, the Free Market Economy and Economic Imperialism. From this small beginning we would enter a new golden age of peace, love and understanding and McFly would be sacrificed to Mighty Cthulhu in an orgy of blood and violence!!!

Sorry got a bit carried away there.

Instead I've mainly bitched about letters to the local paper, inflicted my favourite poems on you and wittered about music. Och well eh?

Anyway last night I opened a bottle of beer and sat down to begin my great crusade against the forces of oppression. This was it I was finally going to make my mark on the world.

Right after checking out my Hogmanay videos on Youtube. They'rr from Stonehaven and I quite like the peeps throwing fire about but from there it was all downhill. You see the problwm with Youtube is that there's just so much fantastic crap on it that you never seem to get around to checking it out but last night it turned out that I had plenty time and plenty beer to finally check out the good stuff.

For true brilliance the first place to go is sunny Turkey famous as the gateway to the Middle East, future member of the EU if they can ever get around to stopping the Kurd oppression bit and purveyors of dodgy film rip-offs the most famous being Turkish Star Wars with it's blatant stealing off Star Wars footage blended cunningly in with the story of two middle-aged space pilots who crash on a desert planet and proceed to battle dodgy evil peeps. Highlights include a fabulous training montage in which you get to see our heroes buff bodies as they build up their kewl powerz by hitting rocks, the cantina fight scene with it's Turkish kung fu and a subtle plot full of romance and danger. I don't know much about art but I know hilarious crap when I see it and this is it. Sublime.

Close behind in brilliance comes Turkish Superman with it's ground-breaking special effects and powerful central performance. Frankly Superman is scary as hell in this film.

But ludicrous films are not just the provenance of our European cousins our American ones can be just as bad. In the 90's schlock director Roger Corman owned the rights to make a Fantastic Four movie but he had to make a movie in order to retain. At the last minute they threw together the first Fantastic Four movie at the last moment. The whole movie's there in 10 minute chunks if you can bear it. I recommend it if only for Reed Richards ludicrous haircut.

I've also come across peeps just being daft I mean why would anybody dare to try the MC Hammer Dance when we know that Rosa is the true mistress of the Hammerstylee even if she's a little out of practice and says she'll batter me if I ever put up a video of her getting down. I'm a little disappointed that the actual episodes of Red vs Blue have been taken down due to Disney releasing them as DVD's as it is a piece of genius which should be loved in that special was by all Halo fans Bowchickawowow!

So it looks like the human race is doomed to keep repeating all the same mistakes but at least we've got plenty of hilariously funny videos to watch as civilization falls and hey you never know I might get around to posting my 10 point plan to solve the Middle East crisis later. Right after I check out these Sims 2 videos though.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

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